Total Drama Action: Lost Cut
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I am a Total Drama Fan, much like everyone else. I have watched the show since it first aired in 2007, but now I wish I had never even seen the thing.
My journey began on Tumblr.
I had been sending messages to FreshTV over a course of three months, sending them over 600 messages per day both on Tumblr and via their website. I had gotten several cease and desists orders in the first month, but after hiding my IP Address and using fake information I was able send them without any legal problems coming my way. Eventually they began cracking and telling me what I wanted to hear, or I was able to read inbetween the lines. One message Tom McGillis himself sent me was:
"Please stop messaging us so much, you have sent so many messages to us that it is actually taking time from production of Total Drama Season Five. If there is anything that will make you stop, please just tell us already, I don't know why the RCMP can't do anything to get rid of you for us."
My eyes shot up at that regard and my next response was typed up immediately after I had recieved and read that message:
"I want every single prototype version of every single season of the show thus far."
I did not receive a response, and because of that I made sure to let them know I am waiting via Tumblr. Not long after I started doing that though, after the airing of the Ridonculous Race, they stopped taking Tumblr asks. I resorted back to direct e-mail messages. Eventually though, something came in the mail. It was a box full of Total Drama DVDs, all of them completely unlabeled. I squealed like a fangirl when I saw one labeled "Camp TV" and another labeled "Total Drama Comedy." they actually sent me what I asked for.
Indeed, they took the time out of producing Total Drama All-Stars and Pakhitew Island just to produce actually would-have-been versions of every single Total Drama Season! I couldn't have been a happier fan of the show! I got to binge watching immediately.
However, things got weird when I got to Total Drama Action, the second season of the show. For starters, the entire collection disappointed me. As it turns out, it was all just slideshows of everything they actually made of the seasons prior to the final product and not full blown seasons. I felt ripped off and cheated. How dare they not see that my true wishes should have been fulfilled. I made sure to take out my mom's witchcraft book and curse the two seasons they were currently working on in place of giving me what I truly deserved. Only once the curse was complete, did I put in Total Drama Action even though I knew then that these were not prototype seasons and were instead just a "how far we got" sort of deal.
I was wrong in regards to this season.
It actually was a complete Total Drama Season rather than a making of or how far we got sort of deal. I could tell it was legit too, because the date was labelled as 2007 - 2008, and those were when Total Drama Island was aired not Total Drama Action, so my excitement was restored in FTV after this revelation that they had one complete prototype season to show me. I however, forgot to lift the curse. To be honest though I didn't feel like it. I was too busy watching my new season of Total Drama Action, or technically a full on lost season of Total Drama.
Episode 1 - "Monster Cash"
The episode that started the season off went exactly as normal except there was no music or sound effects, so things got a bit eery and weird at times, but this was still a prototype. In addition, sometimes the animation degraded even more than how it normally is, to a point some shots were more like storyboards and others were just rough sketches. Either way, the plot of the episode was literally just the same as in the actual final product, right down to no elimination at the end.
Episode 2 - "Alien Resur-eggtion"
This episode stayed exactly like the final product, with the alien themed challenge to name teams except when Chef fired his gun at Heather the sound of her back snapping was heard and she fell to the ground completely lifeless. I was immediately horrified and cried tears for her as I saw Chef walk over and stomp on her neck until her head exploded like a pimple as he said "I've been wantin' to do THAT all summer!" in his usual Samuel L Jackson accent and with much malice in his voice. After that, the episode's audio was completely silent until the elimination, when Chris announced that Geoff and Bridgette were eliminated. Except he didn't say eliminated, he said they were "the killers" which I screamed at the t.v. wasn't true. However, that didn't stop Chris from grabbing Bridgette by the ponytail, slamming her onto the ground as Chef restrained Geoff and threw him onto her. The two were then dragged by their feet to a large pit in the ground and set on fire. Chris and Chef sang a campfire song while they listened to Geoff and Bridgette's agonizing screams and the others just watched in shere horror. I cried more than I ever did before. Total Drama was now ruined forever, yet I felt the need to see this season through to it's end. I wanted Chris and Chef to die, and I made sure Tumblr knew about it thanks to having my phone next to me.
Episode 3 - "Riot on Set"
This episode revealed the name for the episode was meant to be literal because all of the contestants were on the set protesting against Chris and Chef. The episode got into storyboards for the rest of it's entire duration, but I saw what happened. The protest very quickly became violent and Izzy ended up killing herself in an explosion accent. In addition, Chris's eyes became blood red at one point and he actually opened his jaws like a snake and swallowed an intern whole at one point. It made me vomit uncontrollably all over the room. In addition, Pentagrams could be seen all over the place in the storyboards, and Chef in many scenes was literally beating the contestants back into submission.
Episode 4 - "Beach Blanket Bogus"
This episode was immediately set in Camp Wawanakwa and was 100% storyboards with no actual animation at all. I was disgusted. This episode had all of the remaining contestants not only brought back to the Season 1 island, but also submitted to inhuman tortures moreso than the real show. Also, Chris now sprouted demonic horns, had blood running from his eyes, and was drawn in a much more realistic style compared to the other characters. With a sadistic grin he submitted Gwen to be buried alive where she was actually shown suffocating to her death. Beth was forced to take a bath in a tub filled with nitric & sulfuric acid and I watched in agony as she melted away. Trent was given a lobotomy by Chef and the process was shown in detail though he survived. Harold was given a paddling until his ass literally exploded. Justin was raped to death by the sharks right on the shores of the beach. Trent was killed when he was impaled from ass to mouth with a giant wooden pole and then had LeShawna forced to eat him. She later died after eating his intestines though. Duncan was punched in the fist and knocked out cold by Chef before Chris rammed his fist up Duncan's ass and pulled out both his stomach and intestines, cutting it off with a knife before dumping out all of what was inside of them onto Duncan. After that, the crying punk had his head shoved up a Bear's ass before he was then skinned alive except for his shit covered head. After that he was thrown into the outhouse confessional and left to die - which he did. I screamed and cried more than ever at this, because Duncan was my favourite character. You better believe Tumblr got a rant when I saw this. Owen eventually cried at one point, and ended up pulling out a gun and shooting himself. However, I saw in horror that after he did, his body was to burst into flames and explode with guts and blood flying everywhere in a truly horrifying scene that made me scream at the top of my lungs at such an amazing character dying so horribly. The only characters who remained were Lindsay and DJ in the season, with Chris and Chef ending the episode with their hands on DJ's shoulders.
Episode 5 - "3:10 to Crazytown"
This episode was short, only 3 minutes and 10 seconds long, but it was the most horrifying of them all. It was 3 straight minutes of full animation, featuring nothing but DJ raping Lindsay ontop of a red pentagram in the background and while Chris and Chef watched with red bleeding eyes and sadistic grins on their faces. Now I could see Chris and Chef weren't just drawn realistically, but drawn hyper realistically. More real than real. Their hyper realism was the most terrifying part as they watched Lindsay get raped viciously by the much larger DJ. In the end, his orgasm actually crushed her pelvis and killed her, something the two hosts laughed about. DJ on the other hand cried. Seeing such hyper realistic figures crying was such a terrifying sight that it made my phone short ciricuit and stop working - preventing me from telling Tumblr about the situation. Once again, I cried tears of pain and horror, but I couldn't bring myself to turn off the DVD.
Episode 6 - "Aftermath"
This was the final episode of the lost season, and it was the most horrifying of it all. It started with a full minute of hyper realistic Chef fisting a shark. While laughing like a maniac. At the same time, it then shifted over to the Aftermath set where DJ was laid out on his back ontop of a red pentagram drawn on the floor with a fully naked and hyper realistic Chris doing stripper style dances around him. After twerking infront of the camera a fire engulfed DJ and was completely burned alive while screaming, only then did the fire pull Chris into it and I saw the truth behind Total Drama. Chris transformed into the truly demonic figure... of the 1971 Willy Wonka. He looked horribly hyper realistic and looked directly into my soul with his firey eyes. It appears that he found a way to continue tormenting naughty and nasty children even beyond the grave. This was not Gene Wilder. This was the monster who he had portrayed in that movie. The interns were the Oompa Loompas, his slaves, his hencnhmen, his demons, and all of that stuff in the factory was only preparing for him to reveal his true nature and take over the world. I screamed as his hand began reaching out of the television set. The moment it touched the outside world my entire room began firing up like it was a furnace and he let out a blood curdling roar at me. I got up and immediately ran for my computer to warn Tumblr about this. When I turned back, brown goop began streaming from the television screen the more he began slowly climbing out of it, it was hot broiled chocolate, and I could see the coloration of blood in it too. The whole time, he had his cane in hand and was growling at me.
I do not have much time left, so please, someone try to find out how to stop him. Total Drama is not pure imagination. It is pure evil.